He's here

He's here.  Came in last night. He's big, has gained weight. Reminds me of Peter when he let himself go. He got big, and started smoking. Of course I would lose attraction. Especially when he didn't even like himself. I haven't heard from him in a while. I wonder if he's married now. I won't be. I am not feeling very attracted to Justin right now. And his jokes are getting lame. He is nervous maybe. He isn't for me, though. Kat was right. I need to let him go. But, I can enjoy his company for now. Enjoy having someone around. Someone to eat with. Someone to talk to. Because life has been quiet here, and lonely at times. I give him 2 weeks. Then he will want to go home. Then I will need to male a decision. I should give myself 2 weeks too.

I'm grateful for...

- my health

- company for next week or so

- being able to sleep last night

- Ruth 

- famil

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