Poppy

Poppy was in my dream. He was younger and had three small kids. I saw him and he saw me. I got upset and left and then he tried to find me to explain. he seemed happy. This is not the first time I see him when he's younger. I don't even remember him like that. I hope he's happy. 

Then, in my dream I was looking for pants and something to wear and couldn't find it. Marcela and I had planned something too, and no one wanted to go. 

Yesterday was rough. I feel angry and starting to really feel the effects of losing Justin. I am glad I am seeing Elizabeth tomorrow. It's needed. I need to talk. I should talk more to Patty and Jenny. Or maybe write more. These feelings are stuck inside. I am there for everyone, but who is there for me? Justin was.

I'm grateful for...

- life

- love

- my health physically, mentally, and emotionally

Comments

Post a Comment

Popular posts from this blog

45 Lessons at 45

              1.          Trust your instincts, but verify when something feels off               2.           You can’t choose your family, but you can choose who you get close to               3.           Cherish moments with kids—they forget when they get older               4.           You can start a fire with Doritos or Cheetos (survival tip!)               5.           Fear is a good thing—feel it and do it anyway, let it guide you        ...
Read more

Work in Progress

Yesterday was interesting. We had the retreat, it didn't go that smoothly but it went. People talked which is the most important thing. We talked about values and I talked to Majo who said I was treating her differently. Very similar to how Maria Cristina felt. Very similar to how I treated her because I was annoyed. I was annoyed by Majo and she called me out. Awareness. It was a great thing because now I can work on that and it won't get worse. I've loosened up as a leader. I have become more me and less of how I should be around this culture. I need to breathe, know when to rest, and maybe take some classes on active listening or empathy. I think it's important for me as a leader because like Majo said, people are watching and my voice is powerful. I need to go back to how I was in Panama. Kind. Patient. Calm. I feel abrupt, direct, quick. Work in progress, but thankful she talked to me especially if others are watching.  I'm grateful for... - awareness of what I...
Read more

RIF Pause

Well, timing might be working in my favor because we just got news that the judge halted the staff cuts. Let's hope that delays things a bit and maybe even stops completely. I hope so. I think Justin was right, I think agencies did what they were told and didn't realize that it wasn't allowed. Good thing we were last on the list. Now I can enjoy my vacation more because we won't be able to cut staff now, at least not next week. This is good news. From angry to relieved.  I'm grateful for... - life - my job - my health
Read more