This Could Be Different

Sebas reminds me of John. John Stoneman. The man I always dreamed of, except he couldn't communicate. Kept me hanging, mixed messages. I don't think Sebas would od that but one thing I notice that's similar is that they are slow. Adventurers. I started thinking of John and how that first part was. We went out a lot, rode a lot, talked a lot. I didn't feel anything flirty that much during that time. It was almost 15 days. I remember being like...come on. Patience. And then one day it happened. I can see that happening with Sebas. Slow. Steady. Seeing each other. Getting to know each other. And then maybe something will happen. Maybe not. What I have to remember is that he doesn't always have to initiate. I can too. I can write him. I can ask if he wants to do something tomorrow when he is in Quito. It doesn't always have to be him. Yeah it's vulnerable, but who cares. We all are. And he is probably thinking that maybe I won't want to. I have nothing to lose. 

As for Sergio, well he is different. He is melting my heart. he writes every day. He's deep. He says good night. He is a deep thinker. He's adventurous in his own way on the motorcycle. The only thing there is I don't know how this would work with him being in Medellin. Hopefully not a fling, but seems that way. Let's see when he comes to Quito. I can see myself liking him. I already do. He's respectful. And also takes it slow. We never met so it's not too fast as it shouldn't be. With Justin it was fast. We talked a lot. Then that turned into wanting to be with each other. It was too much too fast. This could be different. It is different. Sometimes we go hours with out talking and that's ok. 

I'm grateful for...

- Life

- Meeting Sebas 

- Knowing Sergio

- My health physically, mentally, and emotionally

- Family 

- Friends 

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